My Thoughts on Dating In Toronto
written by bradd80
I was born and raised in Toronto. I love this city, and it has a lot of good things going for it: It’s great for jobs, there’s always a lot to do, and it’s not as expensive to go out as some other places like New York and London. Alas, there is one mysterious black cloud that seems to hang over Toronto, it has a really bad worldwide reputation for dating. They’re lots of good reasons. It is the home of the original Pickup Artist(PUA), Mystery. In fact, it is the birthplace of the entire pick up artist movement. Per capita, it has the highest concentration of online dating in the entire world. Speed dating is insanely popular here. Venture out to the clubs, and you can even see for yourself how most of the clubs aredivided in such a way so that cliques are separated from each other and socializing is almost systemically discouraged.
So yes, Toronto – a city where women outnumber men, speed and online dating services thrive and there’s a healthy appetite for sex – is caught in a sad state of romance.
It’s widely considered by the best PUA’s and seducers in the world as being the toughest city to pickup, and as a result for really determined guys like me, necessity breeds innovation. To do well in Toronto, you really have to up your game to fantastic levels. Fact is that if you can succeed in Toronto you’ll do amazingly well in places like Montreal, Brazil, Colombia, South East Asia, and many parts of Europe and the United States.
Some parts of the city, like the entertainment district and the downtown core, are worse than others, such as the Annex and Ossington (or any other hipster areas/hangouts). But the fact remains that you would be hard pressed to find another city where the women in general have as high a degree of aversion to being approached. As they walk by you, they will intentionally avert their gaze away from you and stare at the posters advertising the latest Broadway play. Sometimes they’ll turn their head away to gaze at the empty wall because, well even staring at concrete is better than making eye contact with a guy. It seems like they are all tired of being hit on, and they intentionally try to dress down and look away from you in order to avoid any attempts at friendliness or socialization. The invention of the smartphone was a godsend for Toronto women, now they can stare down at their phone for an hour when waiting in public, because heaven forbid that they make eye contact with anyone, or even worse, a guy might come up to them and actually start a conversation.
I never truly realized how bad it was until I decided to attend grad school at a huge college campus in “Small town, USA”. What I found was for me nothing short of a rebirth. In picking up women in America, I found that girls there were not only more laid back and open to being approached, but a lot of the time they actually came up to you and started conversations. In the bars and on the dance floors, they came up to you and started grinding on you and inviting you home to spend the night with them!
It completely changed the way I looked at picking up girls.
It also made me realize that it wasn’t me that was the problem here, it was the general attitude of women as a whole in Toronto that was the problem.
Girls in Toronto are used to guys hitting on them and this results in it being more difficult to talk to them. In this city, for women the level of entitlement and right to a top 5 percent guy has reached bounds known by no other major city in the world. Women in this city do very well for themselves financially, so they usually don’t need a guy for anything like they once did. They’ll still use you for an expensive dinner if they can, but they’ll of course think they deserve it. I met one of these hot stuck up girls at a club once, she wouldn’t even look at me. A week later I saw here packing bags at Costco.
The worst part is, they wont give you the time of day, but then when you see what their boyfriends look like all you can do is shake your head. Not only are they usually average looking at best, but they usually have a crappy job, no ambition, absolutely no game, and more often than not a major drug problem. Like how do you compete with guys who are ugly, unemployed, have no game, and are addicted to drugs?
There are other contributing factors too. Some have pointed to Toronto’s conservative drinking laws, and that the relatively strict drinking hours at the clubs and local LCBO’s (liquor stores) may explain why seduction and hooking up in Toronto is a little less spontaneous than other cities. I’m not entirely sold on this explanation, as there is still plenty of liquor available at the clubs until 2am and women still seem to have their b***h shields up. However the argument still runs that in other cities, such as Montreal, the liquor flows till 4 or 5 am leading to a generally
slorish sluttier female population.
Another contributing factor to Toronto’s growing reputation as a bad place for men to be, can be its reputation as a growing center of the “feminazi” movement. This may be due to the large concentration of universities in the city, which have ever increasing numbers of liberal minded and pro-women’s rights professors and student groups. Just as one example, the global slut-walk movement started right here in Toronto. Women here are extremely well educated, but not in a good way; They seem to hate men with a passion, and only use them for dinners and whenever they have that certain itch once in while.
It’s like men and women have traded places, and now we are the ones doing the begging and staying at home on Friday nights. While the women go out and party and act like players. Although Toronto women can be some of the most beautiful in the world. I think this has helped contribute to an overinflated sense of ego and a level of narcissism that has no equal almost anywhere else in the world, except for places like New York, LA, and Milan. In these places as opposed to here in Toronto the egos are almost warranted.
Sound like I’m complaining too much? Believe me, if you were a guy living in Toronto you’d be complaining even more! I actually do relatively well in this city when it comes to picking up hot girls, but I’ve always been an extremely hard worker among my friends when it came too meeting women and trying to date them. It’s not like I’m an ugly guy either: I’m 6’1, blond, athletic, and have a great personality and sense of humor and an awesome job and income that would make most women cream in their panties. On top of that, I have a thorough knowledge of game and know how women work and what they react too most positively. Alas, in a place like Toronto, most of these advantages count for little or nothing. Most of my friends have given up, and have fallen back on getting into relationships with women who, I think, are beneath them. You can even see it at the beaches around Toronto in the summer, most of the guys are all buff from working out year round, while the vast majority of women are out of shape and just wait for the guys to approach them. It’s like Russia, but in reverse.
Such is the life of a Toronto female. Sure must be nice.
I’ve banged some pretty hot women here in Toronto, but like I already mentioned that’s because I have a lot going for and understand the concepts of
charisma game. I have been rejected so many times by Toronto women that I have almost (almost) become totally immune to rejection. If you’re an average guy just starting out at picking up girls, Toronto is a bad place to start. It’s kind of like a beginner learning to practice his seduction techniques at a strip club. The odds are just stacked up against his success.
I was reading one of Roosh’s blogs and I think he said it the best when he visited Toronto’s nightclub scene and concluded that the women here seem to be more interested in grabbing hot dogs at the end of the night than in hooking up with guys. In Montreal, me and my friends would drive around and strike up conversations with random sexy French girls that we’d pass by. Most of them were very friendly. In Toronto when we’d do the same thing, we’d usually get ignored or evil cut eye or answers like “Drop dead assholes.” We weren’t even being mean or vulgar to them, we were just a bunch of guys out trying to meet women.
I think you guys get the picture.
For me, I had to adapt to get what I could here. I went online, where I have banged quite a few hotties, all of whom unfortunately have been mentally crazy in one way or another. Also, I happen to do relatively “OK” in the dance clubs here, and by relatively “OK”, I mean I am able to hook up with maybe 4 or 5 girls per year out of maybe 50 or 60 times that I go out. You can get a one night stand here, but you have to try really hard, or be in the right place at the right time. The sad fact is, that dating in Toronto will only be successful and relatively effortless for you if you’re part of some social circle. Girls tend to look only within their immediate social or work circle when dating, and all other guys are strange and not to be trusted.
In Toronto, guys are looked upon by women as being potential rapists, not potential boyfriends. If you haven’t been introduced through a social group, a friend or some other kind of mutual interest group (ie university club), it is definitely a very steep uphill battle in trying to win over a girl in this city. I really hate to sound negative, because I’m actually one of the most positive guys you’ll ever meet, but that’s just the reality of the dating scene in Toronto. All the articles and blogs written in the seduction community are not wrong: Toronto really is a very bad place for single guys trying to meet women.
But never give up. The fact is that yes, Canadians and especially Torontonians can come across as more conservative compared with other parts of the world. What is commonly perceived is that people from the Northern hemisphere are more conservative than countries from the Southern Hemisphere. Be careful with adopting this belief however and remember that whatever you believe in you create plain and simple. Be aware what the accepted belief (collective mentality) about girls from Toronto or Canada is and then CHOOSE whether you want to accept or reject it.
With all the bad things going for it, one really cool thing about living in Toronto is that you have a wide range of exotic women from many different countries. You have a great opportunity to experience many diverse cultures, and that’s rare to find in other places.
There are women from Brazil, Singapore, Japan, Italy, Mexico, Venezuela, Lebanon and Australia all probably living on the same street you are! Where else you are you going to get such a diverse choice? Enjoy the beautiful buffet of women we have here my friends!
Just don’t allow their cold, icy attitude from getting in your way of enjoying it..
bradd80 is a well respected member of the sosuave forum, who frequently posts his tales on trying to date in Toronto in his journal. bradd80 not only inspires men to take action in the field by posting field reports but also encourages self-improvement to become the best man you can be.